It could have been as easy as that "Can you hear me now?" network didn't work at our new house, or on our new property...But that wouldn't be the whole truth...
I have been talking of giving up my iPhone for a year now...You see God has really been working on my distractions, my things that may be addictions, or at the very least things that take a place before Him in importance, if you look at my actions, not listen to my words. Things that prove themselves as non healthy escapes, the proof is in how I use them, how I react when called on my escape, and how relaxation doesn't come...only agitation.
I think as moms we all have them, those things that when we want a break, and we can't leave...we look to to provide a little distraction. Or maybe life is just too much so let's escape...let's get away, at least in our mind.
So when I couldn't even get a hello in before my phone dropped the call, when I needed to make doctors appointments, talk to clients, or you know just my sister in law. I talked about it again. We decided we would try a pay as you go phone, just for the sake of just trying it to see if you could actually make and receive calls here. So we decided but again I didn't act.
But it was time, God said. You see I was visiting a friend, we were there to pray her into a new season...AND what did she say? She held up her iPhone, showed us the cracked face, and said how sad...and I knew, I had no hesitation (except in all honesty, I talked with Tom about it later that night, because we had talked of selling it), I knew I was to give her my phone. So the next day I went and bought a cheap texting phone, and gave her my iPhone.
It was both freeing and scary at the same time. And that night my first night without an iPhone...I looked at my phone maybe 50 times, thinking about checking instagram, or my mail, or pinterest, or texts...and all I could do was text, and even that is not easy. Because trust me, SMART Phones, are SMART, and well non-smart phones...they just aren't! And my husband looked at me and gave me one of the most amazing compliments he's ever spoken...I'm keeping it to myself;-P But trust me I knew, it was the right thing to do.
Because even when you think things aren't that big of a problem, but maybe they are just a little problem, or a little distraction...when you give them up, cold turkey, you realize how much you relied on the escape, how many times you just "checked in" but really checked out of life. At least I do.
So no more iPhone tales, as least not for a while, but maybe just maybe there will be more blogging, more experiencing God's grace, more space for Him to speak, and to work in my life. And maybe just maybe, more present moments with my kids and husband, so that I won't blink and wonder where those years went.
I don't feel left out of conversations...I do miss seeing all of my friends pictures, and their lives through them. But I don't miss the impulse to compare, to self criticize, to feel inadequate...I feel free, to just live my life without checking in on others...unless I happen to be with them or talking with them on the phone:-) Or texting of course!
I know a lot of people don't understand this addiction, this escape. And I don't think iPhones are bad for everyone. But for me, it was an unhealthy way of escaping "real" life. By the way, I also gave up FaceBook, and drinking alcohol...I told you God is working on me! And I am happy for Him to draw me close, and call me to Him, calling me to remove the distractions, the things that take the place of Him, or falsly provide what only He can.
